Category: Financial elder abuse

Older People At Risk Of Being Financially Abused – By Their Children

14 June 2019

The United Nations (UN) has designated today (15 June) as World Elder Abuse Awareness Day. The types of abuse to be aware of include financial, physical, sexual, social, psychological and emotional abuse. Financial abuse appears to be the most common.

While some older people are enjoying their wealth – travelling the world, their luggage broadcasting that they are spending their children’s inheritance  – others live in aged care homes, with their children keeping their eyes peeled on the ‘Bank of Mum and Dad’.

As economic conditions worsen, this second group is at greater risk than ever of being financially abused. Financial abuse involves taking or misusing an older person’s money, property or assets. It also includes persuading an older person to change their will through deception or undue influence.

Research has identified adult children, particularly sons, as the most common perpetrators of financial abuse. The victims are often women over the age of 80. Like other crimes perpetrated mostly on women – domestic violence and sexual assault – financial abuse is often a silent crime, unreported and unacknowledged. As a result, there is little reliable data on its extent.

The most vulnerable include older women with diminished capacity due to dementia and depression. According to the Office of the Public Advocate, older women are more likely to be declared legally incapable than older men. This may be due to the fact that women live longer than men. It may also suggest that older men are revered whilst older women are infantilised. This was certainly the case in Julie’s family.

Julie is a middle-aged woman with four older brothers who were all educated at elite private schools and have had successful careers. With unseemly haste, a few days after her father’s death, a GP was asked to declare Julie’s elderly mother legally incapable. That she was bewildered, grieving and in the first weeks of widowhood after 64 years of marriage was not taken into account.

After Julie’s mother was declared legally incapable, the youngest son, Tony*, became her financial power of attorney. Without any guidelines to help him manage his mother’s money in an ethical manner, Tony recommended his mother gift some of her money to her children. This gift would help his siblings with mortgages and other debts. “Mum doesn’t need this money and it’s going to be ours soon anyway”.

Julie was horrified. Should middle-aged men who all have professional jobs with decent salaries rely on inherited money to help them with loans they chose to take out to support their lifestyles? Julie told her brothers they had ‘early inheritance syndrome’.

Adele Horin coined the phrase ‘early inheritance syndrome’ to describe children with a sense of entitlement to their parents’ assets. These impatient children are not prepared to wait until their parents die. Children with ‘early inheritance syndrome’ often make ageist and sexist assumptions that devalue the rights of their elderly parents.

Tony assumed his mother, who had not been the family’s breadwinner, would find discussions about financial issues complex and stressful. He arranged family meetings to discuss ‘the family estate’ without his mother present. This was not only patronising it also disempowered his mother.

Julie’s eldest brother told his siblings he was planning his retirement. He unashamedly cast his eyes towards the Bank of Mum. Without blinking, he requested regular spreadsheets of his mother’s expenses so he could know his “financial position”. He assumed what was once ‘Mum and Dad’s money’ was now his money, not his mothers’ money.

There have been several legal disputes in which sons have sued their mothers over a ‘family estate’. In one case, a former pupil of a private boys school took legal action after the family estate was left to his mother rather than to him. The judge castigated him for having a “highly developed and unhealthy sense of entitlement“.

This gendered sense of entitlement is reminiscent of the Victorian era. In those days, a wife became her husband’s property, his chattel. A married woman could neither own property in her own name nor control her own money. The laws changed over a hundred years ago. Thankfully so too did attitudes towards married women. Older women may be the last bastion of Victorian traditions.

Soon after Julie’s mother’s 90th birthday party, three brothers complained that their mother’s monthly expenses were “excessive”. They wanted Julie to curtail these expenses. They also wanted to restrict their mother’s visits to her beloved beach house. Julie’s sister-in-law explained: “Your brothers are worried about their inheritance. What’s wrong with that?”

Julie defended her mother’s right to spend her own money. One brother supported her; the other three bunkered down, ensconced with others who shared their privileged views. These brothers refused to engage with Julie. They simply dismissed Julie’s views as offensive, describing her as mad and bad, as powerful men often do.

The financial abuse of older women is on a continuum of violence towards women. It should be a criminal offence. For financial abuse of older people to become a criminal offence, attitudes towards older people, particularly older women, need to change.

 

Infantilising older women to disguise financial abuse

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What would make a man eulogise about his dead father at his mother’s funeral and then propose a toast to his “mother and father”?

This eulogy was more than your garden-variety misogyny. It was misogyny on steroids.

Listening to the eulogy, I was transported back to the to the Victorian era. In those days, a wife lost her personal identity when she acquired her husband’s name. A wife became her husband’s property, his chattel.

Victorian marriage and property laws stipulated that a married woman did not have a separate legal existence from her husband. A married woman was a dependent, like an underage child or a slave, and could not own property in her own name or control her own money.

The laws changed over a hundred years ago. Thankfully so too did attitudes towards married women. Older women may be the last bastion of Victorian traditions.

Some older women are treated like an underage child after their husband dies. They are encouraged to appoint a financial power of attorney because older women, particularly those who have not been the family’s breadwinner, are assumed to be incapable of managing their own financial affairs. Not only is this patronising but also it disempowers older women.

The ultimate act of disempowerment is when an older woman is declared legally incapable. According to the Office of the Public Advocate, older women are more likely to be declared legally incapable than older men. This may be due to the fact that women live longer than men. It may also suggest that older men are revered while older women are infantilised.

Once an older woman is declared legally incapable, an enduring power of attorney, both financial and medical, is appointed. The financial powers of attorney take complete control of their mother’s financial affairs. The older woman is then transported back to the Victorian era. She loses control of her own money, just like a young child.

Financial powers of attorney are required to act in the older woman’s best interest. If they don’t, it is financial elder abuse.

There is little reliable data on the extent of financial elder abuse. State Trustees Victoria found that women over the age of 80 are most at risk of financial elder abuse. They found that adult sons were the most common perpetrators of financial elder abuse.

Financial elder abuse may begin with the best intentions – with children acting as their mother’s financial power of attorney thereby managing her finances. This can quickly progress to a sense of entitlement, particularly when adult children have mortgages or debts.

In some families, children are not willing to wait for their inheritance until after their mother dies. They assume what was once ‘Mum and Dad’s money’ is now their money, not their mothers’ money. They may even curtail the amount of money their mother spends.

There have been several high-profile trust fund disputes in which sons have sued their mothers. In one case, a former pupil of a private boys school in Sydney sued his mother after the family estate was left to his mother rather than to him. This “old boy” was castigated by the judge for having a “highly developed and unhealthy sense of entitlement“.

Financial elder abuse is currently not a criminal offence in Australia. It is treated as a private issue, like family violence was treated during the Victorian era – before the work feminists did to make it a public issue. For financial elder abuse to become a criminal offence, attitudes towards older people, particularly older women, need to change.

Published in Women’s Agenda 19 November 2015

 

 

The rise – and risk – of ‘early inheritance syndrome’

Children with early inheritance syndrome feel a sense of entitlement to their parents’ assets. They are not prepared to wait until their parents die. These impatient children seek ways for their parents to give them money, or interfere in the management of their parents’ assets to protect what they see as their entitlement.

Article

Elder abuse is often family violence

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Financial elder abuse is often family violence. Research shows that women over the age of 80 are most at risk of financial elder abuse, with adult sons being the most common perpetrators.  It is often a silent crime – unreported and unacknowledged. Like all silent crimes perpetrated mostly against women, financial abuse will be difficult to police.

Claudia Castle’s examples demonstrate that the opportunities for children to act inappropriately are enormous. There are no formal mechanisms to ensure that financial powers of attorney act in an older person’s best interest.

Boomers with early inheritance syndrome feel a sense of entitlement to their parents’ assets. They make ageist and sexist assumptions that devalue the rights of their elderly parents. They often justify their actions by saying: ”Mum doesn’t need money now, and it’s going to be mine anyway.”

For financial elder abuse to become a criminal offence, attitudes towards older people, particularly older women, need to change.

Sarah Russell

Greedy son syndrome

Letter, The Age

Financial elder abuse is family violence. Senior Law suggests the contributing factor is ageism rather than gender (Domestic violence victims not just women). However, research shows that women over the age of 80 are most at risk of financial elder abuse, with adult sons being the most common perpetrators.

Some children assume that older women, particularly those who have not been the family’s breadwinner, are unable to manage their own finances. After the father dies, they encourage their mother to appoint a financial power of attorney, often a son. In some cases, the mother is declared legally incapable.

Children with ‘Early Inheritance Syndrome’ feel a sense of entitlement to their mothers’ assets. These impatient children will actively seek ways for their mothers to give them money. They claim: “Mum doesn’t need money, and it’s going to be mine anyway.”

Some greedy children keep their eyes peeled on the Bank of Mum. They curtail her expenses, such as money she spends on holidays, carers and Kingston biscuits. They protect what they see as their entitlement.

The financial abuse of older women is on a continuum of violence towards women. It should be a criminal offence.

Sarah Russell, Northcote

 

 

 

Keeping an eye on the bank of Mum

Australians are living longer and living richer than at any time in our history. The Intergenerational Report predicts that 40,000 people will celebrate their 100th birthday in 2055. Some older women will enjoy their wealth – travelling the world, with their luggage broadcasting that they are ‘spending their children’s inheritance’. Others will live in an aged care facility while their children keep their eyes peeled on the ‘Bank of Mum’.

State Trustees Victoria report ‘For Love or Money: intergenerational management of older Victorians’ assets’ shows that women over the age of 80 are most at risk of financial elder abuse. This research found that adult sons are the most common perpetrators.

Financial elder abuse involves taking or misusing an older person’s money, property or assets. Studies confirm that financial abuse is the fastest-growing type of abuse of older women. So much so that Senior Rights Victoria suggested the terms of reference for the Royal Commission into Family Violence should include elder abuse.

When a father dies, some adult children assume what was once ‘Mum and Dad’s money’ is now their money, not their mothers’. They are not willing to wait for their inheritance until after their mothers die. Children with ‘Early Inheritance Syndrome’ feel a sense of entitlement to their mothers’ assets.

These impatient children will actively seek ways for their mothers to ‘gift’ them money, or will interfere in the management of their parents’ assets to protect what they see as their entitlement. They will keep a close eye on their mother’s assets and curtail her expenses, such as money she spends on holidays and carers.

According to the Office of the Public Advocate, older women are also more likely to be declared legally incapable than older men. This may be due to the fact that women live longer than men. Some children assume that older women, particularly those who have not been the family’s breadwinner, are unable to manage their own finances. After the father dies, they encourage their mother to appoint a financial power of attorney, often a son.

Children with ‘Early Inheritance Syndrome’ make assumptions that devalue the rights of older women.

  1. “Mum doesn’t need money, and it’s going to be mine anyway.”

In cases of financial elder abuse, this is the most common justification given for taking a mother’s money whilst she is alive.

  1. “Mum finds talking about her finances stressful.”

Some children believe that their mother finds discussions about financial issues complex and stressful. This is not only patronising but it also disempowers older women to make choices about how their money is spent.

  1. “Having a large amount of money does not improve Mum’s quality of life.

Most of us take comfort in the security of having savings in the bank. Why are older women different?

  1. “Mum will be no worse off after gifting her money to her children”.

This statement is absurd. By gifting money to their children, the children are better off at the expense of their mother. The less money an elderly woman has, the less money she will be able to spend on herself. 

  1. “Reducing Mum’s income will reduce her fees at the aged care facility”.

Lower fees at the aged care facility means more money for the beneficiaries of the will (i.e. the children). However, many older women may appreciate the care that they receive in an aged care facility, and are happy to pay higher fees for receiving good care.

  1. “Reducing Mum’s income will reduce the amount of tax she needs to pay”

Gifting money to children will result in Mum paying less tax. This may be a good thing for the children, but certainly not for society.

  1. “Mum’s current will cannot be changed”.

Most people change their wills throughout their lives as their circumstances change. Why are older women different? Spending years in an aged care facility may change an older woman’s ideas about how the money is distributed after she dies. She may prefer to give some money to Doctors without Borders, The Lost Dogs Home, or even a kind nurse at the aged care facility. This is her decision, not her children’s.

  1. “By gifting money to the children, this gift reduces their children’s loans and interest payments on these loans.” 

Should middle-age professional people expect their elderly mother to assist them to manage their ‘lifestyle choices’?

Financial elder abuse may begin with the best intentions – with an elderly woman asking a child to act as her financial power of attorney. This can quickly progress to a sense of entitlement, particularly when adult children have mortgages or debts.

There is little reliable data on the extent of financial elder abuse. It is often a silent crime – unreported and unacknowledged. Although the banking industry has introduced initiatives to help prevent this silent crime, financial elder abuse remains difficult to police.

Published in Online Opinion